Published December 22, 2007
Meteor
Here I am
Hear me now
I'm falling down
Here I am
Feel me now
I'll take your every breath away
High above
Above the clouds
I'm coming down the ground
Here I am
See me now
I'm burning right here for you
Behold me right now
As I disintegrate
Into the dust
Hoping
Dreaming
Wishing
That you'll be there
To keep me
Here I am
Hear me now
I'm falling down
Here I am
Feel me now
I'll take your every breath away
High above
Above the clouds
I'm coming down the ground
Here I am
See me now
I'm burning right here for you
Look at me right now
As I glow like
Bright as the sun
Flashing
Shining
Fading
Right here
Just for you to see me
Here I am
Hear me now
I'm falling down
Here I am
Feel me now
I'll take your every breath away
High above
Above the clouds
I'm coming down the ground
Here I am
See me now
I'm burning right here for you
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
141,379 Literary Works • 674,383 Reviews
I like it! It reminded me of Jack's Mannequin... uh, a lot of people don't like them, so if you don't, it was meant to be a compliment, either way. >.<
Anyway, nice song. :]
Interesting concept. Again, I'm not sure how you're performing this, but I think cutting some of the repetitions would aid you. You have to leave them aching a little, you know? Play with your imagery, man, I think you can get a little more vivid. If a line ever sounds like it was written by Diane Warren, be afraid.
What are your influences by the way?